The terms worried, stressed, and anxious are often used interchangeably. But they are not interchangeable. Related, but not the same, and understanding the distinctions among them is crucial for supporting your child. How can you help your child identify and navigate these feelings? Beyond offering reassurance, are there additional effective strategies for addressing them? 

It is natural to be concerned about your child’s mental health, especially if they have a history of anxiety or a related condition. However, it’s important to avoid oversimplifying or overcomplicating the situation when seeking help. For example, worry is usually a temporary feeling, and it can even lead to positive actions. Your child might worry about taking a test or auditioning for the school play. These concerns are typically short-lived and resolved once the event reaches its conclusion. Worry doesn’t usually require professional intervention and it can lead to productive steps, like studying a few extra hours for  an exam.

True anxiety, however, is different. It is persistent, all-consuming, and doesn’t dissipate after the problem is resolved. Anxiety is often disproportionate to the issue at hand, or it can be generalized, existing without a specific cause. This can lead to extreme stress, affecting one’s perception of themselves and the world. Anxiety can also have physical symptoms, such as elevated heart rate, stomachaches, or changes in appetite. In extreme cases, it can interfere with relationships, school, work and sleep. Anxiety can – and should – be addressed and treated.

The good news is that there are more effective treatments than ever before, including self-care strategies and specialized professional help. While this topic is too complex to treat here in a comprehensive manner, here are five tips to get you started:

  1. Talk to your child and observe their behavior. Help them identify situations that cause distress, and don’t dismiss their feelings. Discuss these situations, and then support them in taking steps to alleviate the distress. For example, if your child has a job interview or a performance coming up, help them prepare and remind them to stay mentally present.
  2. Teach positive self-talk. Model how to reframe worries. For example, you might say, “I’m a bit worried about the snowstorm tomorrow, but I tell myself I’ve driven in bad weather before, I’m cautious, and I’m prepared.” This helps your child see how to manage their own worries with a rational mindset.
  3. Prioritize physical health. A healthy diet and sufficient sleep can significantly reduce anxiety. Feeling fit supports mental well-being and helps regulate moods.
  4. Encourage deep breathing and stretching. Simple exercises can help calm the mind and relieve stress. Even a few minutes a day can make a difference.
  5. Don’t hesitate to seek professional help if needed. Talking to a trusted friend or family member can help, but if your child’s anxiety is interfering with many aspects of life, consulting a mental health professional can provide valuable strategies for coping.

If your child’s anxiety is causing them to withdraw from activities they once enjoyed, avoid friends and family or engage in excessive drug or alcohol use, it may be time to seek additional help. There are many effective, evidence-based treatments that can alleviate anxiety and help your child regain balance. Most conditions related to worry, stress, and anxiety can be treated successfully.

Naomi Angoff Chedd, LMHC, BCBA, LBA, is the Director of Counselor Support Services for Counslr, a leading B2B mental health and wellness platform. By partnering with Counslr, schools, businesses, and organizations throughout the U.S. can provide live text-based mental health support, and unlimited access to mental health resources, to everyone in their communities.
For more than two decades, Naomi has worked with children and young adults with autism spectrum disorders, anxiety, and depression, and she believes in the healing power of play, humor, and authentic connection. She is co-author with Karen Levine, PhD., of three books: Attacking Anxiety (London: Jessica Kingsley, 2015), Treatment Planning for Children with Autism Spectrum Disorders (NY: Wiley & Sons, 2013), and Replays (London: Jessica Kingsley, 2007).